I remember the words of the late Tom Hutchins, an old, beloved friend. His words will live in my heart forever:

“Neal, make pussy your self-administered reward for concentrating on your art.”

That was seven years ago, in 2001.

To this day, I have only heeded those words but on a few occasions. And, albeit, those few have been momumental in bringing my art closer to fruition. But, I admit, the occasions in which those words were not heeded far outnumber their opposite.

I have, to date, done 15 paintings, big ones, and a very particular detailed style, and have a great space. I built a web site, learned some more IT. I’ve created some concepts which I’m proud of, and done more writing than anything. Been through 8 jobs in the last 3 years, and slept with 12 more women.

Hmmm. It’s obvious the latter is a bit more weighing than the rest.

Although I’ve made women quite the subject of my art and I expect that to last.

I am finally fulfilling what my Dad (and everybody else) always reminded me of: paying for my mistakes. In 2005, ‘the guys’ told me “Neal, waiting tables is far below your skills and intelligence and won’t make you much money.” Despite the fact that I had my reasons, which were to have a job during a 3 day period and have 4 days off to do art. This would have worked actually, had I actually done work in that time.

I took pleasures and experience instead.

I feel all this is turning around for me, and it is, but the unemployed thing has got to go, and has, I have a new job, of which I’m too embarrassed to put on record, even if I am its only audience.

Okay, so, I do have goals which are on their way:

Get Job- Done

Obtain Capital Equipment

Street Vend Art Prints For Money- On the Way, have means of making quality print files.

Get into Art Galleries

Get Health Insurance

Get Health Screened

Save Money

Pay Back Debt

Improve Credit

Do More Paintings

Get a Real Job

Put up More Websites for Personal Concepts

Move to France permanently in 2 to 3 years.

Well, there it is, and pussy I’ve got, but I’ll make sure to treat myself and take candy only accordingly.

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