I remember the words of the late Tom Hutchins, an old, beloved friend. His words will live in my heart forever:
“Neal, make pussy your self-administered reward for concentrating on your art.”
That was seven years ago, in 2001.
To this day, I have only heeded those words but on a few occasions. And, albeit, those few have been momumental in bringing my art closer to fruition. But, I admit, the occasions in which those words were not heeded far outnumber their opposite.
I have, to date, done 15 paintings, big ones, and a very particular detailed style, and have a great space. I built a web site, learned some more IT. I’ve created some concepts which I’m proud of, and done more writing than anything. Been through 8 jobs in the last 3 years, and slept with 12 more women.
Hmmm. It’s obvious the latter is a bit more weighing than the rest.
Although I’ve made women quite the subject of my art and I expect that to last.
I am finally fulfilling what my Dad (and everybody else) always reminded me of: paying for my mistakes. In 2005, ‘the guys’ told me “Neal, waiting tables is far below your skills and intelligence and won’t make you much money.” Despite the fact that I had my reasons, which were to have a job during a 3 day period and have 4 days off to do art. This would have worked actually, had I actually done work in that time.
I took pleasures and experience instead.
I feel all this is turning around for me, and it is, but the unemployed thing has got to go, and has, I have a new job, of which I’m too embarrassed to put on record, even if I am its only audience.
Okay, so, I do have goals which are on their way:
Get Job- Done
Obtain Capital Equipment
Street Vend Art Prints For Money- On the Way, have means of making quality print files.
Get into Art Galleries
Get Health Insurance
Get Health Screened
Pay Back Debt
Do More Paintings
Get a Real Job
Put up More Websites for Personal Concepts
Move to France permanently in 2 to 3 years.
Well, there it is, and pussy I’ve got, but I’ll make sure to treat myself and take candy only accordingly.