I’m a White Male with an Upper Middle Class Background.  And I’ve Had a Hard Life.


I’ve had a hard life. Not many can really say that in the existing middle class. Whatever that is today…

We’ve been trained to think of Smokey the Bear: That is, the social notion about ourselves: that it’s our fault and we are the ones to blame for society’s woes. When it’s actually our leaders.

It’s not.

“Your fault.”

It’s the fault of the rich and the system of wealth preservation. I’ve enjoyed this system and receive money from it to this day. I am myself a hypocrite, business conspirator and war profiteer of the middle class.

Nonetheless, it’s not my fault.

I’ll make a list:

  • I lost my mom when I was 19
  • she was terribly sick my whole life and finally we put her to sleep in 1998
  • My brother was 14
  • My Dad lost his marbles and considered his children emotionally extraneous soon after my mom passed and married a horrible, horrible person and is with her to this day. She will not take care of him, despite his devotion and he doesn’t get it
  • The Second Great Depression Began in 2008, and my Dad went from $120,000 as a Real Estate agent, or more a year, to $27,000 or so as a school bus driver
  • He tried suicide in 2014
  • I lost my marbles in 1999, and moved all over the world and had a daughter in France whom I was unable to see without money for many, many years
  • I have a severe learning disability that impaired reading on top of dyslexia and low latent inhibition
  • I’ve only started to – read – in 2006 because of ebooks, Kindle and the iPhone
  • I am a painter in a country where true fine art does not sell
  • And then told that it does
  • I wasted over $65,000 on the scam of art education in higher learning in the U.S.
  • I was picked on by black and hispanic americans my whole grade school 12 years
  • I sucked at sports and everyone made fun of me for it my whole life. I took it very seriously.
  • I never fit in despite my apparent looks and girls were after me to some extent
  • My teeth will fall out in 5-7 years without $50,000 of dental work, after insurance.
  • My own friends all pretty much sold out to the system with the slightest touch of pressure. I held on in poverty for many years.
  • 16 years. Of poverty. 5 of it by choice. The first 5.
  • I am a painter in a country where real artists are shunned, or at best, invisible
  • I live in a country where the startlingly vast majority, is dumb as rocks.
  • I live in a country where New York City is the only great place left. And its invaded by the worst kind of pretender, Yuppie tripe, scum.
  • I live in a city, Boston where everyone is fake. Not even one free beer.
  • I probably have cancer
  • And in any case, will probably not live to see my 60’s, if not 50’s.

So, yeah it’s not our fault.

I’m here to tell you, it’s really no one who makes under $300,000 a year’s fault.

It’s the Big guys. And they are guys.

History will have its way with them.


The Bastille will again avenge us.




From the Looking Glass.

Treason doth never prosper… For if it prospers, none dare call it Treason.

John Harington

Watching Good Morning America reminds one of how truly fascist our system is.

“This is what 1.5 BILLION DOLLARS looks like!”

A commenter tells us spiraling on a literal crane far above three monolithic stacks of ‘Benjamins’ in Times Square: the epicenter of Capitalism.

Celebrities, football, product placement, monogamy and money-worship are the top themes. Animal Agriculture, being meat and dairy are pushed to the point of a total-environment.

Meanwhile, celebrities are primarily, neurotic, dysfunctional people; football stars are heroes of untold riches, while teachers are paid dirt and the cheering crowds linger as future zombies from a in-extant healthcare system.

Monogamy is touted as the omni-present standard because children are the way the system keeps people pacified and ever occupied consumers, while 60%+ cheat on their spouses and always have.

Meat and dairy while the obesity rate is nearing HALF the population.

The environment is on the verge of total collapse and the human race, according to most scientists on Climate Change could very possibly face extinction within this century.


The more desperate things seem, the more fanatical and exuberant the propaganda. Our clothes drip with the blood of slaves. But we call them: sweat shops workers. 

“Oh, but they’re paid!” A Capitalist would cry.

Paid enough to subsist on bread while Bolivian children are charged for their own drinking water.

Far less than a criminal would get.

“Great deals for your mind, your body, and your soul.”


“Countdown to the Oscars.”

Drone strikes on civilian populations.

“Get fit and eat a burger with a wheat bun!”

Meat is killing with cancer with rates that dwarf cigarettes and asbestos combined

“Loose weight with Weight Watchers,” says Oprah.

And she’s still fat.

The big lotto winners crown the USA Today porn star commentators.

And this is the best system on Earth.

The Western European, U.S. and Canadian establishment.

But the reality: the people are to blame.

Not their leaders, not the system itself: but the fact, as Plato knew—that the masses themselves cannot rule their own destinies, or the world will plummet into chaos. And it has.

It is The People that fight for their rights and improve Democracy. It is also The People that tear it down for a donut and a cheaper coffee bean.


“It is the great fortune of those in power that people do not think.”

-Adolf Hitler

Most people are not meant to use their brains.

Because they are Dancing With The Stars to the point of a knife in the back to make sure their cars run and children are fed. They’d sell out a friend to make themselves look better, then battle the guilt while sipping a latte.

Think about the real perpetrator of the aforementioned reality: The People. 


The Prime Directives for a New Society (Draft 1)

1. That an abdication of intellectual life, as one guided primarily by reason in most realms; is an abdication of the right to liberty and the pursuit of happiness. i.e. the right to vote

2. That human social organization is to be dictated by the mental advancement and self-actualization of its constituent individuals.

3. That free will is only free within the known, and therefore, the known must be expanded as a moral imperative for the protection of value, life and liberty and the constuent members of the society, by the constituent members of that society.

4. That not all humans are created equal, by evolutionary design, but that it is the onus of humans to correct this by means of technology.

5. That inassimilable cultures are to be dealt with by means of peace and evasion whereever possible. i.e. the prime directive from Star Trek

6. That disagreements are not the result of preference or will, but of a gap in knowledge. Hence, it is therefore the onus of those disagreeing, to resolve that gap, and never wherever possible, to consent to disagreement.

7. That all presently irresolvable conflicts are permited to remain pending on the basis of ongoing knowledge seeking and reexamination.


No matter how downright crazy we are, Americans are some of the absolute most creative people on the planet. It’s because we accept living on our own terms as absolute. We’ve paid the price, and continue to pay…So does the rest of the world. But ask yourself, why is it, even the people we subject to oppression, want to be us? In so many cases as to be a worldwide brand?

The distance between an idea and its living reality is perception and possibility.

The distance between an idea and its living reality is perception and possibility. This distance is what prevents convergence of point of view, forever enslaving us to endless wars with ourselves.  People must get in touch with the deeply implicit, subtle embedded cultural and familial assumptions and behaviors behind their point of view–in order to see around their point of view.

What you thought was a wall, is actually four walls with no encasing “house.” But the thing is, you think of it as a real house. And you see it as a collection of things, but you may have forgotten a telescope and windows.

This “non-house” includes these four walls with four doors.

The doors lead to no where but other non-houses with other non doors. But you are distracted from this fact because there may be many things in these “rooms,” but only things you have already found. You start to feel you are discovering things when you’re really unearthing things. Both are important.

The thing is that all the walls and doors exist, but since they go no where, they might as well really just not. This is the same with playing only chess with yourself: you are acting without an external purpose, and will only repeat already discovered walls and doors.

The illusion of this house is the root of our doom until consciousness makes it our invariable salvation.


Our personas react and conform to the people we are most immediately near.

ImageEven and especially when you protest certain things your lover, spouse, roommate, whomever…actually commit to action that day or everyday. The way to circumvent this is with conversations aimed at setting up situations where your patience and energy are optimal. For example, I used to drink coffee, caffeinated coffee everyday. When finally I stopped, and fully didn’t crave it anymore, I drank decaf and do to this day. It still has caffeine, but you shouldn’t be drinking coffee if you have anxiety. Ever.

If little by little we changed little things about ourselves, we’d get along a lot better. Most are closed to communicating in words. They don’t know this, they even completely aware or aware at all that others communicate a lot More with words and a lot more effectively and on many higher and differing levels. Language is the cornerstone of all progress human, let’s keep extending it to our love lives, to our families and children.

Just think of all the horrible social rabbit holes there are out there to fall into.

…And sometimes never get out of.

I think of my younger readers who might be thinking of the whole growing up thing… Be warned, watch out for these things.

  • College – I went to the top art school in the world. Or one of them, SVA in New York City. It wasn’t a waste of money per se, but that’s largely if not wholly because of New York. I had millionaire art teachers…artists, real artists. But they were more artists than teachers and the Fine Art Dept was so well underfunded that they get your mind into thinking that old out of date supplies were a luxury out of sheer brochures. 😉

– Sex – makes you slave to an unwanted pregnancy or a line of products from condoms, to you name it.

  • Your Job – makes you actually work for the people you are most likely buying from, and perpetuates a mentality of conservatism which leads to low growth.
  • Your Parents – Who taught you “so who’s happy,” or “pride go it before a fall,” “don’t get too big for your britches,” “go to college” (even though you’ll be a slave to your loans and be forced against risks and you end up having to take that easy route for the sake of security. And then… Well, then they’ve got you haven’t they?
  • Guilt and Shame – Our society is rife with it, and would most certainly have you believe otherwise.
  • DUTY. This is the most important one I think. And the most insidious. THE EXPECTED HIEARCHY OF SOCIETY. This is how soldiers are made; how mean are in the end, able to be convinced by means of propaganda and hype, to go to a place and fight a people they’ve never seen, and pay the highest price.
  • The 40 Hour Work Week. Studies are showing from a British think tank I forget the name of now, but that firmly has studies to show that 60% of the time a worker is producing, a good one, and a 20 hour work week is more efficient if work is upped to a much higher percentage. Besides, freelancing, hello?
  • FOOD. Eating out costs me in full blown form, around $800 to $1200 per month. Just to fucking feed myself. Groceries all month, around $400. Yeah. We shant fail to menton of course that our overly consumerized super markets geared toward sodium and sugar and convenience…are also something we should try and avoid. Shop more organic and local, find stores for specific needs.

Don’t entirely avoid these of course, as they tend to be the fruits of life after all. But they are certainly items that society will try and use against you. Don’t fall into it. That’s all I’m saying.

This list will be added to and go on, but for now, I ask you out there, you people: is it really worth it if your life isn’t extraordinary?